I've already written once about this moron who joined us at work a few years back. Today something happened that made one of the most amazing working days of my life! It was lunch time and I was reading. I didn't have anything for lunch and I wasn't hungry. I realized that The Mumbling Guy took his lunch into his office and started eating as usual. Same shit that he does every day! And I was thinking: how could these people have the same thing over and over, every fucking day: Going to the nasty kitchen, put their garbage disgusting food in the fucking disgusting microwave, hear the stupid beep beep, going back to the office and chowing like a horse! That would suck, if I had to do it on daily basis. I then turned back to my book, which by the way is for another certificate and I gave it another break, I realized he was talking at the same time that he was taking the bites. That lasted unusually for about, maybe 6 to 7 minutes. I went back to my studies and forgot about it.
About one and a half hour after that I noticed that he went to The Screamer's office and said something. Then returned to his office. I got out of mine and I caught him in his big Wal-Mart jacket going out of the office. It was obvious that he was not calling the day but I pretended I had thought he was leaving by saying: See you tomorrow. He said that he was not leaving and he would be back with some familiar face(!), the Newlywed's wife! I was thinking what the hell could have happened? Did they have a fight and the girl came to him to seek help?! It would be very embarrassing to do so but you could expect everything from these guys!
He came back after a few minutes with the woman following her and they went to his office and talked. I went back to my own business and then she left after a few minutes and was replaced by The Screamer with the door shut! I wonder what was going on and then the girl showed up again and The Screamer left. This time the woman in the office with the door shut until she was escorted to the door and left and this time The Mumbling Guy pointed at me asking me to go to his office. The problem with these people is they cannot keep something to themselves for even 2 minutes! You tell them something, the whole town is aware in less than an hour! So he told me what had happened:
Apparently someone called this fucking stupid moron from a Government agency, that I would rather name it here, in the early morning waking him the fuck up and telling him that he owes some big cash, over $5000 and he has to make a cheque or draft and give it to someone in the airport or he would be deported!! This fucking fool believes it and goes to a financial institute and requests the draft or whatever that could be considered that much money. Somehow his fucking bitch wife, who seems to have a bigger brain than him suspects the whole story and calls The Mumbling Guy's wife. She in turn calls The Mumbling Guy and he direct everyone to the department's head who happens to be a fucking arrogant jerk!
I was about to burst into laughter a few times but I controlled myself and just conformed whatever he was telling! He said that he even had asked the Newlywed to turn his cellphone off, take the battery and the SIM card out! Can you imagine someone as stupid as that! He added that the guy and his wife were sitting in the HR and he was worried that he had that big cash in his pocket! I'm usually a guy who enjoys situations such as that and adds more wood to the fire(!) so I agreed with everything he had said and added that he should not let them to spend tonight in their apartment tonight! I said: I would have invited them over, if I had a bigger apartment. I don't even have extra blanket, bed sheet and pillows! He said that he had a guest room and he was considering that!
And this is the story of a fucking idiot who has a Master's in Engineering and claims that he is a genius! While I was sitting there I realized two grocery bag and a nasty cheap Wal-Mart jacket which appeared to be the woman's! There were a few pieces of vegetables and hygiene items in the bags. I don't know way the fucking idiot decided to do shopping in the middle of this chaos!
He then told me not to say anything and I left his office. The girl came back again after a few minutes and left with his grocery bags! I have to do a follow up by showing my sympathy tomorrow so I will have another funny story again!