Sunday, July 10, 2022

Two Tests for the Job

I was told that there would be tests which I would have to pass, when I first had my interview with The Boss-to-be. I didn't mind. For that job, I would have written as many job as they wanted me to! Not that it's something significant with a high salary! I just wanted to get the hell out of the shit-hole I was in and I still go to once a week! It reminds me of that episode of Seinfeld named The Chinese Restaurant:
Jerry, George and Elaine have a plan to catch a movie but want to grab a bite before that. They go to a Chinese restaurant and wait to be seated. The wait is unusually long. While they're waiting Jerry turns to Elaine and goes: You see that table over there? There's a $50 here for you, if you walk up to their table, say nothing, grab an Egg-roll and walk back here! Elaine goes: Are you serious? And Jerry says: $50! Elaine this time turns to George and goes: What do you think George? And George (Jason Alexander) is as awesome as always! He goes: For $50? I'd put my face in the soup and blow! 
So my situation was quite similar! When he said I would have to write do a test, I was going to say: Sign me up for as many tests as you want! So we practiced a bit, I and The Tot Lover, and it came the test day. The boss sent me a message on Teams and said that he wanted to see if it worked! I didn't understand what it had to do with the damn tests! It didn't anyway and he was not happy! We contacted the IT and they were able to quickly resolve the issue. I was very eager to see what Teams would have to do with the tests. We, I, The Tote Lover and the boss all moved to a big room and prepared to do the closed book written exam. The exam was administrated by a lady from another province and she was watching us throughout the lens of the boss's telephone camera and there would be no way to switch to another tab while doing the test on our laptops. Fine. What was the role of Teams here? Nothing!
We started the test and we had 40 minutes for 40 questions, If I'm not wrong. I almost finished while I had about 25 minutes left and I decided to go back and review all of the questions. That was when The Tote Lover turned to me and said he had finished! He got 87% which was pass but because he got lower than what we were supposed to get in one section, out of the five, he had to re-write that section! I finished my review and got 90% without any re-write! The boss was really happy at this point and teased The Tote Lover! He eventually finished that part and we both entered(!) a break based on the boss's instruction! I really don't know why we needed a break! We were sitting on our butts for nearly 4 hours without doing anything rather than moving a computer mouse and now we needed a break and and lunch! No wonder why these two freaking morons are fat as f*ck! Lunch comprised of a number of small Subway submarines, bottled water and Bubly! I had a few and saved a few for later(!) and then after one hour of well-deserved break(!) we went to the work-shop to do the test. 
The Tote Lover went first while he was being filmed by the boss, for the administrator and he passed despite a few mistake he had and we pointed at them, secretly! Then it was my turn! I had two mistakes! One was blamed on the boss by himself and I really appreciated that although I don't think it was such a big deal and then the second one was pointed at by the boss again and the lady administrator said that I was allowed one mistake! It was something minor in regards to the number of times that one specific action should take place. I passed as well and despite those mistakes I believe I did much better than The Tote Lover. The boss was very happy at the time and kept saying that we had done a good job although he was a bit angry about my mistakes! Then he e-mailed a number of people in the company and that was it. We cleaned up and said goodbye to the boss. We are ready to perform the test the minute the company requires them now that we're certified. If there is anything interesting about the field tests, I'll post them. For me, apart from the unnecessary pressure from the boss, the practical tests were very easy! I have done more difficult than that but I had to prove that I'm okay with this one as well.   
(Photo: Elaine, George and Jerry in The Chinese Restaurant episode of Seinfeld. Kramer [Michael Richards] was upset that he had been put aside and had no role in this episode)

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