Monday, January 02, 2017

The Revenant: Fictitious Story of Hungry Europeans!

There was a lot talk about this movie, The Revenant, last year this time! Yes! It's almost a year now! Don't tell me I'm way behind. I wanted to watch it then but when I read all the reviews I realized it was another Hollywood shit like many others that they release! I watched it in late Nov. last year but the post was postponed until now due to its lack of importance.
Today I'm happy that I didn't even spend a Penny on such a nonsense! I understand why there were so many negative reviews about that and they are mostly regarding the story. The acts are not bad but they are not something brilliant though, especially the DiCaprio's! Here are a few points that based on them I was not able to stand the movie and watched it once miserably(!) in case you haven't watched and intend to:
1- This movie is based on the life of an 1800's guide and trapper in northern US, to be specific North Dakota, named Hugh Glass. The events depicted in the movie, partially happened in that state which, in case you don't know, is not covered in snow-capped mountains and ice-covered rivers as it's shown in the movie. It does have the Red River Valley, which starts from Manitoba and that's where the actual events took place. So from the beginning, you see that the movie is fucking shit! Why does the director or screen writer changes the location of the story?! The only logical answer comes to mind is that they wanted to intensify the movie and make it more exciting, which I truly don't see it happening. It could be as exciting and real at the same time without so much bullshit in snow and icy river, although this is not the only problem!
2- This DiCaprio guy who fell in the icy river several times(!) and was swimming in it like it was a city pool(!) I hardly believe could have survived the real temperature, if it would be real! I have been living in Alberta for 11 years now and I have been close to Bow River in winter. Even looking at it in winter scares you! I have seen ice slabs at least 30 cm thick when ice jam happens. The temperature goes down to -21 ℃, such as tonight. What happens to someone who falls in the river and remain afloat for, say, 15 minutes?! I don't believe he would be OK.
This picture, that I took from Bow River, in the last days of December shows how scary it is. Falling in this frigid water and going with it, I don't think, will allow the body to relax. You can even see the thickness of ice on the right side of the photo
3- This guy has several incidents in his life and survived them all! 
a- He got mauled by a Grizzly really bad!
b- He fell in frigid waters! 
c- He was attacked by Natives a few times and not single bullet or arrow hit him!
d- He fell while on the horse a few hundred meters from a cliff and barely had a scratch!
e- He slept outside in fatal cold whether and wasn't bothered! 
4- I remember reading that Stephen King was quite disappointed with the adaptation of his novel, The Shining by Stanley Kubrick. They say there are differences. How about the fundamental differences 
between the life of Hugh Glass and the stupid The Revenant?!
a- Hugh Glass never married a Native woman and never had a child!
b- Hugh Glass never avenged his sun death, obviously. 
c- Hugh Glass went for the guy who Tom Hardy played him(!) but didn't kill him. 
This last part, item number 4, is all OK. You can twist the story the way you want to be able to sell it but bull-shiting audience by showing your actresses on the top of a 2500 or 3000 m. mountain in winter (there's actually a scene of the movie where the crew and actresses are transferred to the top of a mountain in the Canadian Rockies!).
After all this is the story of hungry Europeans who came to North America for money. There fought Natives and between themselves. Tom Hardy's character, Fitzgerald abandoned the guy whom he was supposed to take care of, killed his son and when his cover was blown later by Glass himself, robbed and killed his boss! The Chef said it once and that is all true. These two countries, The US and Canada, was established buy hungry, poor Europeans and now their descendents have forgotten where they came from !
I love nature, I love outdoors and I love movies in that genre but The Revenant is simply is piece of crap, a waste of money and time and pure nonsense! It has got nothing. 1 out of 5 for all the nonsense they try to feed to audience. 
(Photo: The opening scene of the movie. Glass and his son are hunting and they hear gunshot. They come back to the camp and see Natives are attacking. Surprisingly none of them suffers as much as even a scratch! They get to the boat and get the hell out of there)

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